The “Locker Room” Is a Very Special Place
Gosh, I might have just dug myself into a deep hole with that title.
I’ll see if I can climb my way out.
No promises.
One of my best and dearest friends, Greg Schneider-Bateman, emerged from a University of Minnesota lockerroom back in the spring of 2005.
We had stared each other down — not in that way, you pervert — a few times while swimming a couple of lanes apart.
Upon multiple observations, we seemed to be of similar swimming ability.
I was intrigued.
Our timing never seemed to line up, though, so we really never got a chance to break the ice.
Until one fateful day…
We finished our respective swims around the same time and headed to the shower.
Standing there in the buff, dechlorinating our locks, one of us said something to the other:
“How many days a week do you swim?”
And that was all it took.
Almost 20 years later, Greg has been by my side day in and day out.
Greg has helped me through things.
I’ve helped Greg through things.
We’ve watched each other build our respective families, careers, and lives.
I wouldn’t be the person I am today without Greg.
The locker room is a very special place.
I don’t have a picture with Greg (this needs to change, Greg!!), but this is with his dog, Fox, who he’s trusted me with. He’s even trusted me with his house…and kids!
Another dear and cherished friend, Alex Wyble, also emerged from the locker room.
We had recently moved back to Minnesota from Florida and I was trying to find my footing again.
Life had changed.
I left Minnesota used to a life of singlehood.
When I — sorry, we — returned, we were a family.
Life was a lot different.
The way life happened had transformed.
Kids have a funny way of doing that to us.
One fall day in 2022, as I was changing into my Speedo at my locker, I saw someone walk by with an Ironman backpack.
“You’ve done an Ironman?” I asked.
And that was all it took.
Over two years later, Alex and I connect on an almost weekly basis.
Alex has helped me through things.
I’ve helped Alex through things.
This past December, I had the opportunity to watch Alex walk across the stage after graduating from Northwestern Health Sciences University with a Doctor in Chiropractic.
This past summer, Alex paddled a kayak next to me while I swam 5 miles across Lake Minnetonka.
In two weeks, my family and I will have the opportunity to meet up with Alex and his girlfriend, Morgan, in Flagstaff, Arizona to do a day trip up to see the Grand Canyon.
Alex supports me and I, in return, support Alex.
I wouldn’t be the person I am today without Alex.
The locker room is a very special place.
At least I have one here: that’s Alex — always around to support our boys!
And then there is Anthony Hutchinson.
My “brother from another mother” as we both like to quip.
While I didn’t meet Anthony in the locker room, our relationship around triathlon quickly took us into the locker room.
Over the years, and over many hundreds of workouts, the two of us have shared many a naked therapy and coaching session in the White Bear Lake YMCA locker room.
While the workouts always provided the container to start the conversation, the places the conversations went from there have been transformational — for me, and I like to think, for Anthony, too.
We’ve navigated cross country moves.
We’ve navigated relationships.
We’ve navigated fatherhood.
We’ve navigated careers.
We’ve navigated life.
Anthony has helped me through things.
I’ve helped Anthony through things.
I wouldn’t be the person I am today without Anthony.
The locker room is a very special place.
Anthony and I (and a much-needed bag of Lay’s Potato Chips) navigating utter defeat — together.
I still gotta dig myself out of this deep hole.
So, what’s the point?
Well, I could keep going on and on.
About the relationships that I’ve built in the many lockerrooms I’ve stepped into around sport.
This newsletter all stemmed from a conversation with another swimmer — 75-year-old Mark Kaplan — this morning while we were changing after a swim workout.
“Mark, you know the one thing I wish was different — I wish there was only one locker room here!”
“Why’s that?!” he asked.
“It’s such a great place to build relationships — really get to know other people.”
“You know, Reed, it really is.”
“I’m glad you’re part of this team, Mark!”
I think there is something very special about getting completed naked — I’ll try a different term: vulnerable— around others who share similar interests that creates deep, transformational connections.
We all have a “locker room”.
Yours just may look different than mine.
Those things that drive you — your hobbies, your passions, your interests, your goals — keep showing up.
Day after day.
Because, as you do, you’ll start to realize that the fullness of your life expands because of the conversations that you start to have with others.
Not only do you get better at what you do, but you’re more and more surrounded by people who help shape who you are.
And…what a gift that is!
Onward.
May your mind wander…