Greatest Movie Scene of All-Time: The Bethune Theory

Last week I shared my Dokkōdō: What I Know Now That I Wish I Knew Then.

I was blown away by the responses:

“Reed, I started my Dokkōkō!”

I strongly encourage you to do the activity—it’s transformative.

I want to expand on one life precept—and I apologize in advance for the language.

There Is No Normal
And the more you try to find it, the further you get from yourself. Fuck the status quo—it’s boring anyways.

This one stems from one of my all-time favorite movies: Angus and, in my opinion, the greatest movie scene of all-time.

A little background…

Angus is a coming-of-age comedy about Angus Bethune, a kind, overweight 14-year-old high schooler who faces constant bullying from the school quarterback, Rick.

Angus harbors a long-time crush on popular student, Melissa.

Chaos ensues when Rick rigs the Winter Ball voting so that Angus and Melissa are crowned king and queen.

Rick’s expectation: Angus will be publicly humiliated.

Unfortunately for Rick, Angus knows something that Rick doesn’t: The Bethune Theory.

About 6 weeks ago I was sitting in Luke Winskowski’s backyard drinking coffee after a 6-mile run.

I met Luke through Foxjets Masters Swim Team.

Luke, in no particular order, is the President of 49 Financial, head coach of the Benilde-St. Margaret’s Boys Swim Team, and an amazing father and husband.

To me, Luke exemplifies leadership.

In the simplest form of a definition of leadership, Luke guides, influences, and inspires those around him.

I’m lucky to call Luke a mentor, a coach, and, most importantly, a friend.

During that backyard coffee conversation, Luke said something that’s stuck with me.

I had just shared something that I’m personally navigating—a life instant where I’ve been trying to fit a square peg into a round hole:

“Reed, in high school, I used to wear clothes that were so counter to what everyone else was wearing. I didn’t care what people thought of me. I never have. I’m really comfortable with who I am. You have to be comfortable with who you are, with your beliefs, and with your decisions.”

And, to me, that is what is so influential about Luke: his authenticity and his self-awareness.

It’s felt.

As Angus Bethune tells us, “There is no normal.”

But the pressure to be “normal” can scare people into hiding their true selves.

You know, be a square peg trying to force yourself into a round hole.

Because being authentic—being who you truly are, warts and all—is an act of courage.

True bravery means knowing you can be hurt or crushed, but still going out to face the world anyway.

As Angus Bethune says, be able to stand there and say:

“I’m still here, asshole.”

I’ll leave you with this:

Maybe people who claim to be normal are just terrified of being who they really are.

It takes a lot of self-awareness and courage to be authentically you.

But…

“…if the element is brave, if the element can hold out long enough and face the torment of the system until the system’s energy is depleted, if the element can look the system in the eye and say, ‘I’m still here, asshole!”, then the system will have to change, adapt, and mutate.”

…and your leadership only amplifies.

Onward.